Saturday, May 17, 2014

The Comedy of Joel Keefisch

By Jeff Simpson

Joel Kleefisch, the first dude, the highest paid substitute teacher in the state, took time away from hunting on the Wisconsin taxpayers dime, to pen a practically unintelligible Op-ed entitled "God Is Real"!  

Luckily we at CogDis, spending enough time with Knotsies and trolls, are able to speak Kleefischese, so we will translate:

As Shakespeare said, "Me thinks thou doth protest too much." When I saw a school group staring at a sign on the first floor, it piqued my interest. The sign read, "Nobody died for our 'sins' Jesus Christ is a myth." My first reaction was a chuckle, not at the serious accusation of my Savior's suffering taking place for naught, but at the irony of the sign and its sponsor, the Freedom From Religion Foundation (FFRF) whose leaders continually wage a futile fight.

So removed from rational thought, the group has resorted to bumper sticker slogans to get their anti-message, message across

Speaking of anti-message, messages - Joel Kleefisch voted AGAINST honoring the victims of the Sandyhook tragedy!    Let us continue -

The FFRF pops up now and again attempting as they say, to eliminate all religion from government and public display or acknowledgement. The irony is that every fight they embark upon inevitably inspires potential agnostics to look into their waxing or waning faith a little further.
 Forget what Joel is saying here as he pulled this statistic right out of his ass.

 For years they fought the state Capitol Christmas tree and wanted it to be called a holiday tree. Not only does holiday mean holy day, but the public gnashing of teeth brought people out of the woodwork to defend the Christmas tree. Even former Wood County Assemblyman Marlin Schneider, known for his liberal ideologies, authored a measure to have the tree officially called the Christmas tree.
Apparently Scott Walker is an all to the FFRF as he continually refers to "Holiday", heck he even wanted the people of WI to give up their Holiday's and give all the money to Him*(him being Scott Walker).   Hard to stray further away from Jesus teachings at Christmas time than that! 

 That brings us to their current sign. In fighting the display of religion, they use blatantly religious text. First off the obvious, whether you believe what Jesus espouses, there is no doubt he existed, therefore he is clearly not a myth. By having the word 'sins' quoted, it leads viewers of the sign to further examine what really makes something sinful.
 Sinful is when you allow a company to poison wells and one of your constituents dies of ecoli. Sinful is also when you finally use your position of power to step in, its on the behalf of the company that polluted and NOT your constituents.

   Many of today's laws are loosely based on what are believed to be sins against society and our fellow citizens. Are they to have us believe that there should be no consequence for any action, or conversely, that there is no reparation for a small sin or minor infraction?

Many of today's laws were passed because someone gave enough money to an Assembly person and then were allowed to write your own bill that you benefit from.   Joel Kleefisch even let one of his wealthy donors(Michael Eisenga), write a bill that would allow him to shirk his duties of paying child support to his own kids. 

 Clearly, the FFRF has nothing better to do than post signs meant to incite people.
Clearly our "full time" assembly members who have not even been in session in two months, who get full time pay and benefits and staff, have nothing better to do than write sill incoherent press releases!

 It does beg the question, what are they trying to accomplish? Their statement has nothing to do with the fight to keep religious symbolism out of public places. Instead it is just a nasty poke directed specifically at Christians. What's next, signs decrying Buddha's teachings? A message claiming Allah is fake? Perhaps a sharply worded, "Virginia, there is no Santa Claus?" The bottom line is, the FFRF is undermining their so called message.
 What's next an incomprehensible press release about elves

 Like PETA, they've gone beyond the pale and are not even considered seriously, which is fine with me.
Next thing you know, they will want guns in our schools and bowhunting on our playgrounds.  That would really be beyond the pale.  

As vehemently as they battle the public advancement of spirituality or religious participation, are they not promoting, or at least suggesting atheism is the right path? It sounds more like they are pushing the Religion of Atheism, than nothing at all.

The First Amendment guarantees freedom of religion, not from religion. I guess if I were responsible for the FFRF marketing message, I'd find some actual proof God doesn't exist to counter the multitudes of proof He does.

Joel, please do NOT leave us for the FFRF marketing team!  Outside of Wild Bill Kramer,

No one better represents the republican brand in Wisconsin than you!

At least he is up on the sexual escapades of the youth in WI!

Joel, we know you are not out there helping or working for your constituents, so please, I beg of you, when you have free time from hunting, keep writing these press releases!


Pure Comic Gold!  

For the Wisconsin residents of the 38th Assembly district, if you are sick of being the laughing stock of WI, and having a representative who just uses your money to be able to spend time hunting you have a choice - Tom Chojnacki.   Volunteer, tell your neighbors, get a yard sign, send him $10.   You deserve actual representation in Madison!  


  1. It is nice of him to acknowledge Labor Day, but to grant it holy day status seems the kind of blasphemy the true Christian knows ends with the devil laughing as you try to negotiate your release.

  2. what an a--hole.

  3. Right-wing conservative xians (Current WI majority government, et al) described and explained to the rest of us. Mr George Carlin

  4. Joel Kleefisch is what you get for life when you have gerrymandered legislative districts. We work for Joel rather than Joel working for us. Unfortunately Jeff, you will have a lifetime supply of comedy from Rep. Bonehead.

    1. Given the growth in Eastern Dane County, don't be sure that Kleefisch has a job for life. He was under 60% last time and the demos are pulling against him.

      At the very least, the DPW should be showcasing this NPD case to the rest of the state saying "If you vote Republican, you're putting power doofuses like THAT."

  5. Joel Kleefisch is living proof you can't fix stupid.

  6. joel stumbles around the capitol and assembly floor drunk off his ass!

    This is actually against the law -- he should be arrested when he is sitting in the assembly voting on bills smashed -- but this is what a gerrymandered state has created.

    Good luck trying to get irving or any of the keystone cops in the capitol police force to, you know, actually arrest the criminals.

    But sing a song or bring a sign in...